In My Own Words: Zack from San Diego

Alina Popa wants you to share your personal story!

Exactly four years ago – holy cow, time sure flies! – I posted on this blog a message calling for readers to submit their own personal stories about how they discovered female bodybuilders, why they love them so much, and what they wish they could tell the world about this shared interest. All anonymously, of course.

Sadly, in the past four years I haven’t gotten a whole lot of feedback from you folks. Oh well. But last week ago a brave soul finally reached out to me and provided answers to the questions I suggested. His name is Zack and he resides in (perpetually) sunny San Diego.

He comes across as a female muscle fan who thinks deeply about his love for FBBs. I’m sure that describes much of you out there! So, read what he has to say. And if you feel compelled to contribute your own thoughts, feel free to email me at ryantakahashi87 (at) yahoo (dot) com. Here’s my original post calling for reader submissions in case you need further context.

You can answer the questions I’ve posed, or you can just spew your thoughts out on your computer and send them my way. Whichever you prefer!

So, without further ado, here’s what Zack has to say, in his own words:

***

San Diego, where it’s the same weather 365 days out of the year.

When did I first discover my love for female muscle?

It all started when I was a 14-year-old high school freshman with hormones that started berserking like typical young men at that stage. One day, I was watching an episode of Fear Factor and I saw one female contestant who wasn’t exactly a “bodybuilder” type but was still well-built and did a couple “poses” before attempting a stunt that required some great physical capabilities. At the time, I was also taking a PE class that had some classroom-esque instruction in the gym involving weight training and my PE teacher was talking about what men and women each like to gain when working with weights (men obviously putting on size, but women wanting to stay firm and sturdy, etc.).

I started pondering the female stature even more to the point where I’d keep an eye out for those Bowflex commercials to catch women toning their symmetrics and continuing my Fear Factor viewings hoping to catch a glimpse of women with the real awesome statures. One day it finally occurred to me to use the wonderful tool of Google to find images of the real treasures and I was hooked. They were a safer alternative to Playboy because many of my peers had to be careful if we ever dared to seek a Playboy magazine in our old man’s secret stash (LOL). As I progressed through high school, my passion for these goddesses was known only to my mom and my sister who would occasionally glance through the internet browsing history on our computer, but they didn’t know what it was evolving into. I even stumbled upon an exercise book on my mom’s bookshelf by the great Rachel McLish, which I would discreetly glance through every now and then.

After my sophomore year, I took a part-time job at a grocery store near my house which gave me convenient access to Oxygen magazine, which I would purchase at the self-checkout machines to avoid any of my coworkers asking me questions about this hidden passion of mine. I guess you could tag it (and still can) as my “guilty pleasure.” Midway through junior year, after a few months of ogling over these glorious goddesses on paper, I had a deep dream one night and it finally happened. I woke up at about 2:00 a.m. after feeling an amazing vision involving a really close bond with the magnificent Monica Brant that resulted in my “little soldiers” deploying themselves for the very first time.

Why do I admire female bodybuilders?

For starters, let’s say I would much rather have Wonder Woman as my girlfriend instead of Sleeping Beauty (LOL).

I admire women of physical and mental strength because just as a typical woman loves a man with confidence, I would want my potential suitor to have the same qualities in herself. During our early years, we become so fixated on comparing ourselves to others that often times we forget about trying to be the best version of our individual selves. If anything, I wholeheartedly embrace my differences because they are a part of what enables me to write my own life’s story by viewing the world from my own perception rather than somebody else’s tunnel vision. Women who are not ashamed/afraid and embrace the fact that they are different turn me on. Muscle is a natural element of the human body for both men and women. Bodybuilding is a sport and form of art; neither of which are reserved for either gender in the first place.

However, I do draw the line somewhere. When it comes to female bodybuilders, the details that determine whether they maintain their femininity or cross the line into the dark territory of being masculine come not from the size of their muscles, but rather their shape and symmetry. If they have deep voices, hair growing in places it shouldn’t be, square-pecs, square-jaw, or other physical traits that are exclusive to men, I am turned off by it and rather ashamed that they would wreck themselves with steroids, destroying and disgracing a pure form of art in the process.

Have I ever met a female bodybuilder (or a woman with a lot of muscles)? If so, what were the circumstances?

Plenty of times, yes. However, I have yet to secure a date with them because they are a scarce thing to find and whenever I’ve encountered them they are either taken or in a situation where it is not easy to strike up a conversation that could possibly lead to a date. It’s happened at the gym and at fitness expos too. Just got to keep my eyes open, wait for the right timing, and it’ll happen. Patience is one of the highest virtues I pride myself on.

Have you ever engaged in a muscle worship or BDSM session with an FBB? If so, how did it go?

I did have one with a prominent FBB from Latin America whom I won’t name for privacy reasons and it went very well. I speak some Spanish (her native tongue) and had a good time and would definitely see her again if I ever travel back to Florida.

How would you react to someone who says that a guy (or gal) who likes female bodybuilders is strange, weird, kooky in the head, etc.?

It’s happened already but I am more than capable of shrugging it off because haters are gonna hate.

Have I ever told anyone that I’m into female muscle?

Through the course of my Navy career thus far I have been on two deployments and porn is naturally an essential for the occasion and I did show to my shipmates the special stash of FBB videos (including nude ones) on my computer which I’ve accumulated over the years. A couple of my friends who are already fitness buffs themselves enjoyed it but everybody else gave the typical negative comments.

If I could tell someone who doesn’t understand your attraction to female muscle one thing, what would it be?

Muscle is a natural element of the human body. That goes for males AND females.

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Kathy Connors: A Devilishly Sexy Muscle Siren

Kathy Connors showing off her gorgeous legs.

Kathy Connors showing off her gorgeous legs.

As far as female bodybuilders go, Kathy Connors isn’t for everyone. She isn’t traditionally beautiful, nor is she especially “feminine” in the mainstream sense of the word.

But for those who “get” Kathy’s appeal, one cannot help but be captivated by her unrepentant sexiness. Miss Connors may not carry the crossover appeal of ladies like Larissa Reis or Minna Pajulahti, but she doesn’t have to. Kathy is remarkable for many reasons; but one reason in particular that stands out is the way she’s forged her own path toward becoming a superstar within a very specific subculture.

Definitive biographical information is difficult to find, so here it goes: Kathy Connors was born on April 3, 1960 in Buffalo, New York. She began working out in 1980 at the tender age of 20 and competed in her first show a year later in 1981. She describes herself as being interested in gourmet cooking, biking riding, skiing, scuba diving, travelling, learning foreign languages, and exploring other cultures. She currently resides in New York City.

Her contest history includes the following, though this is probably not a comprehensive list:

1989 NE Florida – 1st Light & Overall

1990 East Coast – 1st Light & Overall & Mixed Pairs

1990 Southern USA – 1st Light & Overall

1990 Jr. Nationals – 2nd Light

1991 Team USA vs. USSR Exhibition

1992 Florida State – 1st Middle

1992 USA – 3rd Middle

1992 Jr. Nationals – 3rd Middle

1993 Nationals – 10th Middle

1996 NE USA – 2nd Middle

1997 Jr. USA – 1st Middle & Overall

1998 Nationals – 10th Middle

1999 Nationals – 6th Middle

2001 Florida State Championships – 1st Middleweight

2001 Nationals – 7th Middleweight

2002 USA Championships – 13th Middleweight

2003 USA Championships – 12th Middleweight

2003 Southern States – 2nd Heavyweight

2004 North American Championships – 8th Lightheavy

2006 North American Championships – 7th Lightheavy

2007 Florida State – Heavyweight and Overall Champion

2008 North American Championships – 9th Heavyweight

2008 Masters Nationals Heavyweight – Over 45 1st place

2008 Masters Nationals Heavyweight – Over 35 2nd place

2008 USA Championships Heavyweight – 7th place

2012 Teen, Collegiate, and Masters Nationals – 5th

Kathy is a rare breed who has enjoyed success in three different professional ventures: bodybuilding, powerlifting, and adult entertainment. Obviously, the latter is where the most amount of stigma exists. Doing porn, regardless of who you are or what kind you participate in, will cause people to look at you differently. Fairly or unfairly, pornography is still a taboo subject in our society, and those who produce pornographic materials are also by extension considered taboo.

Bodybuilding and powerlifting are also somewhat unusual professions, but they’re obviously not offensive to large swaths of society. Porn is.

I’ve heard that the porn stigma exists even within the bodybuilding industry, an assertion that may or may not be accurate. I’m sure it does to an extent, but I’m also sure there are plenty of people and decision-makers within the industry who either look the other way when a prominent athlete participates in adult films or doesn’t care one iota. Or maybe I’m completely wrong about this. Who knows?

Kathy can definitely sport a sexy black cocktail dress.

Kathy can definitely sport a sexy black cocktail dress.

Regardless, balancing all of these endeavors is a challenge that not too many of us are equipped to handle. And not just attempt to do, but to do well. Kathy Connors may not be a superstar at any of these occupations, but she’s without question respectably accomplished with no reason to hang her head in shame.

Kathy is, as I alluded to before, not for everyone. I mean absolutely no disrespect when I say this, but she doesn’t have a pretty face. I wouldn’t say she’s ugly, but on a scale of 1 to 10 – 1 being Danny DeVito and 10 being Monica Bellucci – Kathy is probably somewhere in the 2-3 range. Yikes. Not impressive at all, if you ask me. But nothing to be ashamed about either.

However, part of that is what makes her so damn charming. Kathy isn’t blessed with a naturally beautiful face, but she’s still sexier than most women half her age. She’s reinvented herself to become an irresistible sex kitten through sheer willpower, strategic thinking, and business savvy.

In her adult-themed videos, Kathy usually takes on the persona of a pseudo-dominatrix who is tough, naughty, and takes no prisoners. She physically dominates her co-stars (male and female) but doesn’t abuse them in any unreasonable manner. Her shtick is to showcase her sexiness through power dynamics. She’s in charge…but doesn’t forget to please the people she’s lording over. She’ll show off her muscles in proud fashion…and will use it to get her co-stars off.

Whether she’s squeezing a man’s penis between her flexed biceps or allowing her male co-star to ejaculate all over her chiseled torso, Wild Kat (her online alias, for what it’s worth) will allow others to experience pleasure in exchange for the opportunity to show off her power and authority. She dominates not in a self-absorbed sort of way but rather in an altruistic fetishistic way. For Kathy, power is the ultimate aphrodisiac…when it’s used properly, that is.

So she’s not authoritative in the scary sense. She means no harm. At the end of the day, she wants everyone to be happy and go home with a big fat smile on their face. There’s a lot to be said for that.

Speaking of which, when watching her in action, one cannot help but notice her deep sultry voice.

Indeed, her voice is what makes her a sexy siren. In Greek mythology, Sirens were creatures who took human female form (sometimes bird form, depending on which version of the myth you buy into) and lured male sailors to their death through enchanting music and singing. A sexy body is one thing, but a sexy voice is quite another. The Sirens that Odysseus encountered in Homer’s The Odyssey were merciless beings who would not hesitate to devour whichever helpless victims were to pass them by. I don’t think Kathy is quite that devious, but her sexy hot voice is enough to lead me into certain death.

Yet another leg shot.

Yet another leg shot.

Her irresistible velvety voice is one of her best features. I could listen to her recite the phonebook for several hours and never get tired of it. Seriously, though. Miss Connors’ voice is unique for being unbelievably deep without sounding masculine at all. A remarkable feat, considering the negative stereotype pertaining to the idea that the sport of bodybuilding magically turns women into men. There’s not a single shred of evidence that this is even remotely true, but that’s a whole other story for another day.

Kathy should know that her voice is one of her biggest selling points. In addition to her muscles, Kathy’s speaking voice is enough to make the hairs on the back of your neck stand up straight. If it doesn’t do that, then you must be either hard of hearing or totally immune to her unique vocal charms. As rich as butter and as refined as fine wine, Kathy’s voice resonates deeply throughout her environment. She can make the ground shake with her rumbling vocal chords. Her dulcet tones are both surprisingly soothing and undeniably erotic. That’s a winning combination that’s hard to replicate.

Obviously, taking hormones will do that to her voice. That’s shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone. Her “natural” voice sounds much different. But as things stand now, Kathy Connors can verbally seduce a man – or more specifically, me – in a way that makes Kathleen Turner seem like an amateur.

When looked at from afar, Kathy Connors possesses three distinct features:

  1. A homely face
  2. A deep, traditionally unfeminine voice
  3. Big muscles

How on Earth can a woman with these characteristics be considered tantalizingly sexy? It doesn’t make any sense. It defies all social norms. It goes against our conventional definitions of “beauty” and rules of sexual attraction. Even many female muscle fans prefer an unambiguously feminine woman with a traditionally pretty face. So what kind of person is attracted to a woman that even the most sympathetic female muscle fan finds hard to appreciate?

The answer to that question is simple: She’s confident in who she is and won’t apologize for being who she is.

Compared to Deidre Pagnanelli, Kathy has almost zero crossover appeal. Deidre has the gorgeous good looks of a supermodel and just enough bulk to put her in the “muscle chick” category. For hardcore female muscle lovers, Deidre might not be big enough, but at the very least they can appreciate her divine beauty and unique ability to capture the attention of “female muscle skeptics” across the globe. Kathy isn’t necessarily the epitome of every single negative stereotype associated with female bodybuilders (Nicole Bass and Maryse Manios come closer to that categorization), but she’s certainly not someone who can convert a non-believer into a believer overnight.

Yet, Kathy Connors has found a niche and is willing to exploit that niche to the best of her abilities. There’s a lot to admire about that. Kathy knows she doesn’t appeal to hundreds of millions of people. But she knows she doesn’t have to in order to be successful at what she does. She only needs a few thousand fans who are endlessly devoted to her and “get” her appeal. I am obviously one of those folks. I find her alluring, even though I completely understand why others might not feel the same way. Nor do I expect everyone else to feel the same way.

Kathy understands that if you’re willing to watch videos of her in action or to look at photos of her, then you must be already on her side. Therefore, she doesn’t feel the need to “earn” your interest. She already has it! And she’ll do whatever she can to keep your interest indefinitely.

She can even sport a bikini!

She can even sport a bikini!

One other aspect that cannot be ignored is the “forbidden” nature of Kathy’s aura. As I mentioned earlier, Kathy isn’t a woman tons of guys (and gals) would normally be enchanted by. She’s not very pretty, nor is she conventionally feminine. We’re not “supposed” to like her. But we do! That sort of goes for most muscular women in this world, but Kathy is a rare exception in that even amongst already-converted female muscle fans, she isn’t considered the most popular FBB in existence. Thus, there’s the Forbidden Fruit element attached to Kathy’s identity.

We’re not supposed to admit that we’re attracted to Kathy Connors. But we are. We’re perhaps a bit ashamed to feel this way. We know it’s strange. We know we’re not supposed to be mesmerized by her. But we are regardless of what out gut tells us. Indeed, Kathy is a Forbidden Fruit. In the deepest recesses of our hearts, we know that we’d rather make love to her than Chrissy Teigen or Margot Robbie. We know the vast majority of society would tell us that we’re nuts. Our friends and family would look at us funny and probably would never look at us the same way. But that doesn’t stop us from feeling that way. Not at all.

Do I personally find Kathy Connors more desirable than Miss Teigen or Miss Robbie, two women whom no one would bat an eyelash if I said I’d love to ravish them all night if I could?

To be honest, yes.

Yup, you read that right.

Although, I’d choose Kathy 8 times out of 10 and choose the other two ladies the remaining two times. But that’s just silliness. Kathy is the Forbidden Fruit sitting next to a cornucopia of hundreds of other pieces of delicious fruit. I can easily choose the others with no judgement from my peers. Yet, I choose the one piece that will cause the largest number of people to raise their eyebrows at me. My head tells me to go with the supermodel or the Hollywood starlet. But my heart tells me to go with the plain-looking middle aged female bodybuilder with a masculine sounding voice.

Wow. How devious is Kathy? Think about it. It’s as though she puts herself out there and says to the world: I dare you to look at me with lustful eyes! I dare you to jerk off to me when you’re all alone and no one else is watching. I dare you to fantasize about me instead of any of the hussies half my age prancing around in their underwear on Instagram!

It’s almost like she’s playing a mind game on us. It’s psychological warfare conducted by an adversary whom you cannot stop thinking about. Kathy is so bold she considers it an act of defiance to strut around naked and show off her gigantic clit for the camera. She loves to talk to her audience and reveal her deep masculine voice to the public at large. She refuses to stay silent. She refuses to put on a hyper-feminine character that would help her reach a more massive viewership. She wants to be the anti-Margot Robbie who defies our traditional notions of beauty, youthfulness, and sex appeal.

Damn girl.

Damn girl.

When we daydream about banging a hot chick in a back alley somewhere, Kathy wants us to fantasize about her being that hot chick instead of anyone else. She wants us to question our sense of “normalcy.” It’s not normal for a guy or gal to dream about having sex with a buff 56-year-old woman with an unattractive face and a man-like voice. Yet for many of us, that’s exactly what we do in the privacy of our own minds. Kathy has us in the palm of her hand and refuses to let us go.

Her defiance is what we love about her. She isn’t the type of woman who “should” do porn. Most women her age would be scared to death to expose their aging bodies like that in such a vulnerable manner. But she does. Most women who are insecure with their looks wouldn’t dream of allowing a camera to zoom in closely on their wrinkle-covered face while they masturbate, which is an act of extreme intimacy. But Kathy does. Not only does she dare to do such a thing, she challenges you to look away, knowing full well that you won’t.

Kathy doesn’t give a fuck that the crow’s feet around her eyes accentuates when she smiles for the camera. She also doesn’t give a rat’s ass when her booming voice causes your computer speakers to rumble like an earthquake. She doesn’t care about these things because she knows that if you’re willing to make it this far, then you’re willing to accept whatever she’s going to present to you.

This is why Kathy Connors is a devilishly sexy muscle siren. She’s someone we’re not supposed to like, but we do anyway. She has incredible assets, even though those assets aren’t appreciated by the vast majority of our culture. She won’t ever have mainstream appeal, but she doesn’t need it in order to thrive. She’s a muscle woman who understands why guys like me love her to death. She doesn’t care if out of one hundred people only three truly dig her. She’s going to stare deeply into the eyes of those three saps and jerk them off until they ejaculate all over her hard biceps, while the 97 others struggle to look away in utter disgust.

Kathy Connors is a rebel. She’s fiercely defiant and proudly unapologetic about who she is. To reiterate the opening line of this article, she isn’t for everyone. But she doesn’t need to be. She’s a grotesque muscle bitch who will dominate you both physically and psychologically. She refuses to hide anything about herself. She, in a metaphorical sense, stands in front of the entire Universe and gives everyone the middle finger while sticking her other middle finger inside her vagina and masturbates until she comes all over herself.

Kathy doing what she does best: looking irresistible.

Kathy doing what she does best: looking irresistible.

She rebelliously shoves a camera right in front of her ugly face, deep wrinkles, big muscles, enlarged clit, and masculine voice and says “fuck you” to anyone who dares to look the other way. If you do look away, she won’t hesitate to grab you by the balls and squeeze until you cry for mercy. Even then, she might not actually give you mercy. Or she’ll torture you until you squirt hot semen all over her maligned face while she dares you to call her “pretty.”

If you do tell her that she’s “pretty,” she might relieve you from your pain. Or she might continue to torment you because you failed the test: You aren’t supposed to call her pretty. You’re supposed to acknowledge that she’s hideous. You failed because you aren’t turned on by her. But once you are, then you’re good to go. You finally “get it” now.

Kathy Connors might be an ugly muscle bitch, but she’s the Biggest and Baddest Muscle Bitch of All Time Who Deserves Our Undying Respect. If you mess with her, she’ll fuck your shit up and laugh as she watches you crawl away in defeat.

Yowza! The Biggest and Baddest Muscle Bitch of All Time Who Deserves Our Undying Respect?

You know what? I get the feeling that’s exactly how she wants us to describe her.

Why We Love Watching a Muscular Woman Masturbate

Look at the biceps of Gillian Ward!

Look at the biceps of Gillian Ward!

There are many activities muscular women do that female muscle enthusiasts love to watch.

Lifting at the gym. Wrestling a hapless opponent into submission. Dominating a weaker man both physically and psychologically. Pumping their clit. Posing for the camera. Talking about her daily routine, best lifts, sex life, etc.

But there is one activity that’s especially compelling, one that deserves special recognition. It’s an activity we all do, although we may not want to necessarily admit it out loud.

We love watching muscular women masturbate.

There’s no denying this. The category of porn known as “solo performance” has much mainstream appeal, whether it features muscular women or “normal” looking women. But it holds special weight among the crowd who loves female bodybuilders. When a female bodybuilder masturbates, we love watching it not just because it turns us on, but because it provides us much needed emotional catharsis.

Think this is a bit of a stretch? Read on.

We all have our masturbation stories. When we first discovered it, when our parents “caught” us doing it, when it came in handy (no pun intended) after a stressful day, ways we’ve improved in doing it after much trial and error, and so on. We were all teenagers at one point, right?

But it doesn’t end after the gloriously awkward days of middle school. No, not by a long shot. Unless we’re a modern day Casanova, most of us do not receive the amount of sexual pleasure from a partner (or multiple partners, depending on who you are) that adequately satisfies our appetites. Many of us need to “release” our built-up tension in other ways. Hence, we do the job ourselves.

Woody Allen is right that we shouldn’t knock on masturbation as a bad thing. After all, it’s sex with someone we love. That’s a win-win in my book.

As a matter of pornography, masturbation is just as titillating an activity to watch as traditional – and non-traditional – sex can be. I don’t have exact statistics in front of me, but I’d be willing to bet that at least 15 percent of porn videos out there on the Internet have at least some elements of “solo performance” attached to it. I’ve seen videos of two people (one man and one woman) masturbating next to each other. They never have actual intercourse together. They just get themselves off with the other person in close proximity. I didn’t find this video particularly appealing, but as they say, different strokes for different folks.

Pun intended? You better believe it.

Returning to our original subject, there’s a huge difference between watching a pretty skinny girl masturbate for the camera and a big, beautiful and powerful female bodybuilder doing the same thing. Both performers will provide their audience the expected dosage of over-the-top fake moans and cheesy convulsing, but the latter carries with her a high degree of interesting context that the former does not.

Lisa Cross is not afraid to show off her assets for the camera.

Lisa Cross is not afraid to show off her assets for the camera.

When a woman masturbates for the camera, the obvious purpose is to sexually excite the viewer. That’s without a doubt reason #1. Yes, she may have exhibitionist motivations behind her, but by and large her performance is for entertainment purposes. Some people may find it more entertaining than others, but that’s beside the point. That being said, when a female bodybuilder gets off in front of the camera, it triggers inside us a whole host of thoughts, feelings, and opinions.

First, we associate masturbation as being the ultimate act of independence. It is, in a literal sense, having sex with yourself. When an FBB masturbates, it reaffirms her devotion to being a strong, independent woman. She’s perfectly able to please herself, thank you very much. It’s not that she doesn’t need a man or woman to please her (let’s face it, many FBBs are also lesbians), rather she knows her body better than anyone else.

Bodybuilders are by their very nature more in-tuned with their bodies than anyone else. It makes perfect sense. They spend years of their lives hyper-focusing on every single square inch of their bodies to ensure it meets their strict definition of “perfection.” This is no small task. So who is best qualified to give their bodies pleasure? That’s right. Themselves.

We love female bodybuilders because they defy so many perceptions we hold about men, women, and male/female relations.  They’re stronger than most men despite women being naturally weaker than men. They’re headstrong, fiercely independent, and refuse to accept the status quo as being adequate. They aren’t women who claim to be strong. They’re women who actually are strong, both physically and emotionally.

Anybody can write a Facebook post claiming to be determined to pursue their dreams. Female bodybuilders, on the other hand, expend blood, sweat, and tears every single day to make their dreams come true. They live out their dreams so that it’s not really a dream, but reality itself.

Can't get enough of Kathy Johansson. Can you?

Can’t get enough of Kathy Johansson. Can you?

This spirit of individual determination mirrors the act of masturbation. Assuming we take a more positive attitude toward masturbation (have you noticed that a man who masturbates is considered a “loser” while a woman who masturbates is considered “liberated?”), watching a female bodybuilder get herself off is just one other example of her taking control of her own life. Her resolve to build up the biggest and brawniest body possible goes hand-in-hand with the desire to take her sexuality into her own hands (literally and figuratively).

When we watch a female bodybuilder pleasure herself with a dildo, vibrator or her own fingers, we’re seeing her display an act of independence that is a natural continuation of the independence she displays in every other facet of her life. Her unique diet, personalized workout regimen, and unorthodox lifestyle separate her from the herd. Her ability to give herself pleasure goes along those same tracks.

Second, we see masturbation as an act of a female bodybuilder rewarding herself for being who she is.

I don’t need to rehash the idea that being a competitive (or a dedicated non-competitive) bodybuilder is very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very difficult thing to do. Male or female, the life of a bodybuilder is without debate a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very difficult thing to do.

Uh, did I mention it’s a very difficult thing to do?

A female bodybuilder makes sacrifices that very few of us would also be willing to do. I’m sure there are days (and perhaps weeks on end) when an FBB really doesn’t want to go to the gym and lift. Her joints hurt. Her muscles are sore. Her back is stiff. Her stomach hurts from eating the same food over and over again and in such large quantities. She’s sick and tired of drinking so much damn water. All she wants to do is open a bottle of beer, order a take-out pizza, and sit on the couch and watch Netflix all day.

But that won’t get her one step closer to placing 1st at the upcoming competition. That won’t allow her body to remain in a condition that her fans expect. Doing that will be bad for business, because these days female bodybuilders have to think of themselves as a one-woman business.

Instead, she has to suck it up and do what’s necessary to keep making gains at the gym and keeping her body in top shape. Her body wants to quit, but her mind must refuse to let that happen.

Abby Marie showing off her impressive set of abdominal muscles.

Abby Marie showing off her impressive set of abdominal muscles.

That attitude requires a level of mental fortitude that not too many of us possess. We all know that it’s easier for men to develop muscle mass than women. So when a woman achieves muscle mass that surpasses that of a man, we know that’s a supremely impressive accomplishment. We cannot imagine how much sacrifice it takes to get to that point. This is why as fans of female bodybuilders we feel a psychological need to “reward” them for their sacrifices.

If we cannot actually reward these women – through gifts, paying hundreds of dollars for a muscle worship session, purchasing their merchandise, or buying tickets to one of their contests – we need an alternate route instead. Watching them masturbate for the camera is, in a weird sense, a surrogate means of “rewarding” them. When we see a strong muscular woman experience a satisfying orgasm (assuming she’s not “acting” for the camera), we experience cathartic release.

Female muscle fans enjoy a body type that is both rare and tremendously difficult to achieve. It’s easy for us to feel guilty about loving muscular women when we know they don’t owe us anything. Female bodybuilders don’t owe us a damn thing. They don’t have to share free photos of themselves on the Internet. They don’t have to produce videos that are easily found by a simple Google search. They don’t have to make their Instagram and social media accounts open to the public. They don’t have to offer muscle worship and wrestling sessions to anybody who’s willing to pay. They don’t have to do any of those things. But they choose to do so anyway.

So when female bodybuilders do allow people like us to enjoy the fruits of their labor, we feel like we’re not worthy, just as Wayne and Garth weren’t worthy of meeting Aerosmith in their basement. We feel a small amount of guilt, as if we’re getting away with something. It seems almost criminal that photos and videos of Gorgeous Muscle Goddesses are available for free on the Internet. That seems rude. In the back of our minds, we feel like access to these women’s bodies should be safeguarded like the codes to our nuclear arsenal.

Like ancient tribes who made sacrifices to the benevolent gods for providing a bountiful harvest, female muscle fans feel like we must provide our beloved Muscle Goddesses a ritual sacrifice as well. Most of us aren’t able or willing to provide an actual monetary gift, so we do the next best thing: We enjoy watching them give themselves sexual pleasure.

When a female bodybuilder reaches the climax of a self-induced orgasm, we feel like she’s receiving the reward she deserves for being who she is. As voyeurs watching this exhibition of sexual self-actualization, we receive emotional comfort knowing her hard work is being given its due. Even watching a female bodybuilder have sex with another person (man or woman, it doesn’t matter) carries the same effect. Anytime an FBB experiences an orgasm, it’s a ritual emotional cleansing for us. We can now continue to enjoy her muscles without any feelings of guilt. She’s happy and satisfied. She’s glowing. She’s purring like a kitten. She’s experienced pleasure. She’s been erotically satiated. And we love that she’s able to experience this. Because damn it, she deserves it.

Alas, no good deed goes unrewarded. There is justice in the universe. Huzzah!

Third, we view a female bodybuilder masturbating as an act of defiance. Too often female bodybuilders face jeers, insults, and rude remarks from mean spirited and ignorant people. People will say hurtful and sexist things about them over the web or worse, to their faces. It sucks. It’s disgusting. It makes us angry. As fans of female bodybuilders, we feel defensive toward the strong women we love. It’s almost tribalist, as if an attack on her is an attack on all of us. We know that’s not technically true, but it sure feels that way.

If I ever saw Colette Nelson wearing a dress like that in public, I should not be held legally responsible for my actions!

If I ever saw Colette Nelson wearing a dress like that in public, I should not be held legally responsible for my actions!

One common insult hurled toward female bodybuilders is that they’re not actually women. They’re either men, wish to be men, or are freaks of nature whose gender identity cannot be properly diagnosed. Her sexuality is brutally deconstructed, minimalized, marginalized, and trivialized. Her femininity is brought into question. Our masculinity (assuming you’re a man) is also brought into question.

She’s treated like a freak, in summary. She’s not human. She’s repulsive. She’s a betrayal to womanhood. Heck, she’s a betrayal to manhood as well. People out there think she deserves scorn because she defies our common perceptions of “what a woman is supposed to look like.”

It’s enough to make my blood boil. I’m sure many of you know what I’m talking about.

However, when a female bodybuilder masturbates, she’s openly defying these insults and is taking control of her sexuality. She’s proving she’s not a freak, but rather an exceptional example of the potential of human achievement. She has a vagina, and is willing to spread her legs out wide to prove it. Her clitoris isn’t a small penis, but a clitoris that’s really damn big. Period. She doesn’t need a man to please her. She doesn’t need to gain anyone’s approval. She is perfectly able to live a fulfilling life regardless of the vitriol thrown her way. For her, masturbation is not just an act of defiance, but a total beat down of all the negative stereotypes thrust upon her.

When we watch a female bodybuilder masturbate, we feel like we’re watching a show of protest. We’re watching a female bodybuilder not just reaffirm her right to enjoy pleasure, but giving permission to other women (whether they’re muscular or not) to do the same. If she can unapologetically give herself an orgasm, you can too. Regardless of what her critics will say, she doesn’t give two shits about them. She’s going to fuck herself with a dildo no matter what. She’s going to moan, groan, scream, and squirm to her heart’s delight.

And there’s nothing you can do to stop her.

Indeed, watching a muscular woman masturbate isn’t just a simple act of erotic voyeurism. It’s almost like a religious experience. Or if you’re not spiritually inclined, it’s cathartic. As she’s experiencing sexual release, we’re experiencing emotional release. We may not know it but that’s exactly what’s going on in our minds.

I realize it’s a cliché to refer to an independent woman as being “liberated,” but that’s not far from the truth. Being free means being able and willing to forge your own path. Perhaps that’s at the heart of the matter. It’s one thing to be able to pursue bodybuilding. It’s quite another to be willing to go through the daily grind year after year after year. A so-called “liberated” woman is free from two things: Obstacles created by society at large and obstacles created in her own mind.

I’m a big believer that the most significant hurdles any of us will ever face in our lives aren’t created by other people, but instead are created by ourselves. We are our own worst enemy. The moment we tell ourselves that we’re going to fail, we’re inevitably going to fail. We can blame outside forces all we want, but at the end of the day our lives are controlled by one person and one person only: Us.

We hold the keys to success. We’re the drivers of our own cars. We lay down the bricks to our own sidewalks. We build the doors that lead to our own success. Once we accept that we can take life by the horns and run with it, there’s no stopping what we can do.

When a muscular woman masturbates, she’s doing that in a literal sense.

She decides how, when, and who can please her. If it’s herself, so be it. If it’s someone else, fantastic. If it’s a combination of both, great. Regardless, she dictates the terms of her own life. Just as she’s sculpting her body to look a certain way, she’s also demonstrating her erotic autonomy. As fans, we cannot get enough of this. As fans, we’re rooting for her to masturbate as often as she wants to. We want her to climax as many times as she desires. Watching this happen isn’t just arousing, it’s a purging of our pent-up frustrations about being a female muscle fan.

Didn’t think watching an FBB give a “solo performance” carried that much weight, did you? That’s the beauty of being a fan of muscular women. No matter how many layers you dig through, you’re always going to find more topics to talk about. The onion goes on forever and ever. Let us keep this conversation going, shall we? For the sake of the muscular women we love, it’s the least we can do.

So keep on masturbating, muscular women everywhere! You know you have a small army of dedicated fans who are in your corner, rooting for you like mad.

For Female Bodybuilding Fans, Workout Videos are Our Porn

The next generation of female bodybuilding, Shannon Courtney.

The next generation of female bodybuilding, Shannon Courtney.

We all have our own vices.

Some of us like to gamble. Others like to party “in da club” till the wee hours of the morning. There are some who enjoy high-fat and high-sugary foods a little too much. How about smoking? Or excessive drinking? Or, *gasp* hitting the Mary Jane a few times here and there?

Unless you’re an ascetic monk living high in the Tibetan mountains, most of us have vices that we’re either proud of or wish would remain a secret. But let’s face it. Unless your vice hurts someone else, what’s the true harm? I, for example, am not one to claim to be a police officer of “outstanding character.”

Another popular vice that many of us share is pornography. Whether we’re talking about late night pay-per-view skin flicks, dirty magazines, snuff films, or good-old-fashioned Internet porn, we all know what we’re dealing with. Porn is everywhere in our society. On the cover of magazines, in popular movies, in clothing store advertisements, in music videos…everywhere. Not just hidden underneath your mattress or behind the playground monkey bars. Both softcore and hardcore porn (however you define either term) is saturated in our culture.

It’s so saturated, we sometimes forget what we’re seeing. Most of us would point to a Jenna Jameson video and say with definitive confidence, “That’s porn!” However, we might look at a Beyoncé music video and say, “Well, it’s not quite porn, but it is quite risqué. I would say…that’s NOT porn.” Fair enough. Everyone has the right to hold their own standards.

The real definition of “pornography” is as follows: “Printed or visual material containing the explicit description or display of sexual organs or activity, intended to stimulate erotic rather than aesthetic or emotional feelings.”

This photo of Lisa Cross might give me a heart attack if I stare at it long enough. But I'd die a happy man.

This photo of Lisa Cross might give me a heart attack if I stare at it long enough. But I’d die a happy man.

Basically, porn is media that’s intended to turn you on. It doesn’t have to be explicit. It doesn’t even have to be visual. Written erotica can constitute as porn if we assume a wide all-inclusive definition. Are risqué music videos or provocative fashion ads intended to sexually arouse you? Well, not primarily. They’re intended to persuade you to buy record albums and clothing. But if the adage that “sex sells” is true – which nobody would argue it isn’t – certainly eliciting an erotic response is one of the tactics used to convert advertising media to sales.

Alright. We’ve established that porn is everywhere. We’ve also discussed that porn can manifest itself in a variety of ways, not all of them explicit. Porn can also have objectives outside of just turning you on, such as convincing you to open your wallet and buy something. Other objectives could include persuading you to think about a social issue in a different way (nude PSAs by PETA, anyone?) or inspiring you toward self-improvement (pole dance aerobics isn’t just for exercise, people!).

This all ties in to female muscle fandom, trust me. What, did you think this post would be totally unrelated to what my blog is primarily about? I start with this simple question:

As a female muscle fan, what turns you on the most?

Many of us would answer with traditional responses like FBBs masturbating, FBBs having sex with scrawny guys (or each other), FBBs dancing around in the nude, FBBs glamorously posing in the nude, etc. Essentially, we get turned on by FBBs doing things in from of the camera that traditional looking women also do in mainstream porn. But if there’s one thing I understand about female muscle lovers, it’s that we’re especially turned on by something else entirely, something that’s not necessarily X-rated.

Workout videos.

Or, more specifically, videos of female bodybuilders doing what they do best: building their bodies at the gym.

When I say “workout videos,” the image that probably immediately pops into your head is that of what Denise Austin and Jane Fonda created in the 80s and 90s. Or maybe those old-school Tao Bo videos by Billy Blanks. Ah, yes. Those were the days. The good old days of cheesy music, bad camera angles, bright yellow stretch pants and enough sweat to fill a small lake. I can’t imagine what it must’ve smelled like in those studios. Yuck.

But, no. These are not the type of workout videos I am referring to. Instead, I’m referring to amateurish or semi-professional looking videos of female bodybuilders pumping iron in the gym. They could be shot on a cell phone camera, a store bought camcorder, or perhaps an actual professional-quality video camera. They could be shot for Flex magazine, Bodybuilding.com or for the FBB’s own personal brand. Quality notwithstanding, the idea stays the same: video footage of beautiful athletes doing what they do best.

For female bodybuilding fans, workout videos are our porn. They are what turns us on the most. They titillate us unlike any other media. We find them more arousing than videos that are explicitly sexual in nature. Sound strange? Let me explain what I’m talking about.

As female bodybuilding fans, we don’t just love the final product. Yes, of course images of Alina Popa or Lisa Cross looking ripped and contest-ready can be a divine spectacle to behold, but we’re just as interested in the process it took them to look that way in addition to drooling over how they eventually look.

What’s arousing about female bodybuilders isn’t just that they look so damn sexy, it’s also the fact that they have to bust their butt in order to look that good. There’s something about the strenuous nature of bodybuilding that makes these athletes so remarkable. Female bodybuilders are especially intriguing because their looks are both unconventional and supremely difficult to attain (and maintain).

This is why a grainy 90-second clip shot on an iPhone of a female bodybuilder, completely covered in sweat pants and an old t-shirt, squatting 300+ pounds is way more erotic than watching two silicone-enhanced teeny boppers sucking on each other’s clits with awful automated music playing in the background. If I were a sheltered teenage boy, the latter might excite me like no other. But as an adult, that stuff bores me to death. It’s unexciting. I’d even go as far as to say that it’s disgusting.

Watching two nameless 18-year-old women engaging in sex acts with total lack of interest or passion while moaning from an orgasm so fake it belongs in a can of Velveeta cheese isn’t erotic. It’s dumb. It’s an insult to my intelligence. It’s sophomoric. It’s a shame to the word “erotic.” I’m not necessarily knocking on those who actually like this sort of thing (I’m just kidding – I am knocking on you!), but get with the program, people! Doesn’t authenticity count for something anymore?

Ah, yes. Now we get to the heart of the matter. Authenticity. Workout videos are authentic. I’ve seen a fair share of fake or staged workout videos, but the ones that are real are so fun to watch because it gives you a brief glimpse into the process it takes to transform a woman’s body from “sexy” to “All-Powerful Goddess.”

If more women looked like Mavi Gioia at the gym, I'd go there every single day of my life.

If more women looked like Mavi Gioia at the gym, I’d go there every single day of my life.

But it’s not just about the process of becoming a bodybuilder or the authentic nature of these videos that excite us so much. There’s something unspeakably tantalizing about watching a woman work hard to achieve her dreams. Maybe it’s because a lot of us guys aren’t accustomed to seeing women lift heavy at the gym. There’s an Internet meme that says that “A girl in the gym is much hotter than a girl in the club.” I would agree with that wholeheartedly. But why do I feel that way exactly?

Maybe it goes back to the meritocratic nature of our society. We love female bodybuilders because they earn their beauty. Not every one of us is born with a beautiful face or flawless skin. But we can (to an extent) control the rest of us. A bodybuilder does exactly that. They are in complete control of their physical selves, even to the point that it becomes an obsession. A ripped body is something you earn with your sweat and labor. Mother Nature may not have given you other natural physical gifts, but if you want six-pack abs, you can go out and get it. If you have the willpower to do whatever is necessary to get it, of course.

Another reason why we love watching women lift is because it goes against our collective history. Historically, men were the laborers and women were the caretakers. Men were expected to do all the heavy lifting, both literally and figuratively. The fact that men are naturally stronger than women explains a lot of this. But these gendered roles still in many regards persist to the present day. So when we’re in the gym – and I should hurry up and say that the “workout video” thing could also apply to stealing peeks at women lifting at the gym – and we see a cute girl deadlifting more than her own bodyweight, it’s pretty damn sexy to watch. Very damn sexy.

Breaking the old rules of male/female roles? Making an effort to sculpt a sexy body instead of relying on plastic surgery, deceptive clothing (padded bras, for example) and heavily caked-on makeup? Yes, please!

Workout videos, and seeing up-close-and-personal women lifting heavy weights, are without a doubt our porn of choice. Regardless of the production values or quality of the video footage, this excites us more than anything. Here’s an example:

On Lisa Cross’ Facebook page, she’s uploaded a short video that illustrates exactly what I’m talking about. It’s a ridiculously short clip of her squatting a ton of weight on a hack squat machine. In the brief 41-second video, we can hardly even see Lisa. We can’t see her face. Nor her full figure. In fact, she’s as completely covered as a nun. No sexy revealing clothing. Nothing glamourous happening here. But she’s lifting a jaw-dropping amount of weight. And you can clearly hear her grunting as she squats up and down. Her heavy breathing isn’t exactly orgasmic, but its resemblance is impossible to ignore. But most important, you truly get the sense that she’s working her tail off. This isn’t showing off for the camera. This isn’t staged. This isn’t theatre of any sorts. This is authentic. She’s actually working out with the real intent of getting stronger and bigger. This is the master artist in action. She didn’t earn my nickname for her, “Lisa Cross, the British Bombshell,” just by sitting on her butt, watching TV and eating potato chips all day long. She’s a beautiful sexy Goddess because she’s willing to do the dirty work a lot of us aren’t too keen to do.

That might be the best explanation yet. The Dirty Work. Porn videos are also known as “dirty videos” because they show people engaging in unclean, filthy sex acts (as dubbed by certain folks). But ironically, workout videos of FBBs doing the dirty work of heavy lifting, grunting, sweating and torturing themselves for the sake of self-improvement are way more sexually exciting than watching two nameless bozos who can’t act have unemotional sex with each other. That stuff is a dime a dozen. Witnessing an elite female bodybuilder work on her craft is like watching Laurence Olivier perform Shakespeare, Luciano Pavarotti sing opera or Itzhak Perlman play the violin. You cannot look away from watching the elites do what they do best. The rest of us mortals can only stare and passively watch.

To reiterate a previous point, men who love muscular women aren’t just interested in the final product. We’re also interested in the process it took to achieve that final product. Workout videos, and other related media, excite us for reasons we can’t fully explain. Watching that video clip of Lisa Cross – and for the record, you can hardly even tell it’s actually Lisa! – genuinely gives me the chills. It makes my heart skip a beat. It’s a feeling I can’t explain, but every female muscle fan knows what I’m talking about. But it’s not just this particular clip. It’s the thousands of others like it.

Alina Popa doing leg lifts. Debi Laszewski doing lateral pulldowns. Colette Nelson bench pressing. Brandi Mae Akers doing bicep curls. Lindsay Mulinazzi deadlifting. Jana Linke-Sippl killing her arms on a bicep machine. Shannon Courtney punishing her rock-hard quads at the gym. Mavi Gioia doing triceps extensions. The list goes on. And these are videos that I’ve seen. No doubt there are countless more like them out there on the Internet ready for us to drool over.

The larger point is that female muscle fans love strong women for a variety of reasons. It’s not just about lust or appreciating a certain aesthetic. Female bodybuilders are unique in so many ways. They have a quality to them that’s almost impossible to describe, but equally impossible to ignore. Once you’re hooked, you instantly “get it.” You understand their appeal and even begin to wonder why you didn’t notice them earlier. I honestly cannot believe why I didn’t become attracted to FBBs sooner. I really started to notice them when I was 18 and a freshman in college. And how did it start? I was researching workout videos online and stumbled upon amateurish clips of beautiful women lifting at the gym.

Well, viola! There you go. For many of us, including me, workout videos were what got us hooked in the first place. So there’s a reason why they hold a special place in our hearts. The element of sentimental value is also at play here. Maybe that explains a lot. Maybe there’s something about witnessing a beautiful woman exert herself at the gym that lights a fire inside our souls. It begins the “Madness,” as the expert blogger Female Muscle Slave puts it.

Come to think of it, calling workout videos “porn” cheapens what they mean to us. “Porn” is what people view to fulfill a momentary sexual urge. Workout videos, on the other hand, have a more spiritual component attached to them. It’s like a music lover watching Sir Georg Solti conduct Beethoven’s 9th Symphony. Or a great philosopher delivering a lecture on the state of the universe. It’s poetry in motion. Watching a strong, muscular woman lift is like a religious experience, or to put it in more easy-to-digest secular terms – it is art. Female bodybuilders are artists. And watching them lift is like watching a painter paint, or a sculptor sculpt, or a musician compose.

Female bodybuilders are masterpieces of human achievement. And witnessing them transform into who they are is as enticing as it gets. Just ask any one of us. All we can do it sit back, relax and indulge in the captivating beauty on full display before our eyes.

Bridgette – Overnight Sensation (part three)

Any driver who doesn't pick up a hitchhiker like Nataliya Romashko would be a fool.

Any driver who doesn’t pick up a hitchhiker like Nataliya Romashko would be a fool.

Several moments later, Jimmy stops filming. Tony takes off his headphones and places them around his neck. Lexie turns off a light to preserve the bulb’s life expectancy. Maggie reluctantly walks toward her “actors” and lends a helping hand to Bridgette. The gorgeous female bodybuilder stands up and looks to be out of breath. Maggie takes out a handkerchief and wipes a small drip of Sean’s semen off her left leg.

Sean snaps out of his trance and notices his surroundings. He sees the camera equipment. He sees the whole set up. Holy shit. Did this really happen?

Bridgette approaches him and embraces him securely. She kisses his cheek and rubs her toes against his toes. A chill runs down his spine.

Yes. That really did happen!

Minutes later, Sean is in the foyer of the mansion fully dressed and back to normal. He finds appetizers, bottles of champagne, candy and other delicious treats spread out across a long oak table. The film crew wastes no time and greedily grabs plates and starts chowing down on this late night feast. Maggie may seem like a boring corporate type, but she sure knows how to treat her employees right. Sean also takes a plate and serves himself up some goodies. All that hot sex in front of the camera roused his appetite.

Eventually Bridgette, dressed in light grey sweatpants and an old Guns N’ Roses t-shirt, makes her grand entrance and joins the post-production party. She hardly says a word to him. Was her cold distance intentional? Did he do something to offend her? Or is she an unfeeling woman who treats him like any other co-worker, despite their recent intimacy?

He is deep in thought. She appears to be preoccupied as well. Then she takes out her phone and starts texting somebody. Her boyfriend, perhaps?

Yikes. Did Sean just have sex with a married woman?

The notion almost makes him want to apologize to her. But he reconsiders when he remembers it was her idea that they do this in the first place. He was merely the lucky son of a bitch who happened to be walking down a sidewalk late at night wanting to do last minute holiday shopping. She was the proactive participant in this matter. Not him, for God’s sake.

A table of delicious appetizers.

A table of delicious appetizers.

At around 1:00 a.m. they drive Sean back to his apartment. Bridgette did not accompany them. She got a bit tipsy and decided to go to sleep. He was not able to say goodbye to her. This bothered him a bit.

Maggie gives Sean her business card and tells him she will e-mail him when the video is up. He shakes her hand and watches the van leave off in the distance. He goes inside and realizes he never went shopping for those pecan pie ingredients. Well, shit. Looks like an early morning visit to a bakery is in order.

Two weeks later

At 5:01 p.m. on a Friday afternoon, Sean prepares to get off work. The heavy rain will guarantee a hellish commute home. Just as he’s about to shut down his computer, he receives a notification of a new e-mail message. Well then. From his personal account. He decides to check it.

It’s from Maggie Schneider. Who is that?

He opens the e-mail. He discovers who it is when he reads her short message:

Hi Sean,

It’s Maggie from Athenian Blue Productions. We were the quirky film crew who kidnapped you a few weeks back and made you the costar of our new film. I’m happy to announce that it’s finally up on our website. We’ve also posted it on Sexy Time Vidz. In case you’ve never heard of it, it’s a hot new porn video site that’s quickly growing in popularity.

You can view the video here. As promised, we blurred out your face so nobody will ever know it’s you. Enjoy, Sean!

Sincerley,

Maggie.

Well. Sean looks around to see if anyone is left in the office. Not a single soul anywhere. So he opens a private browser (because watching porn on a work computer is the best way to get fired) and cuts and pastes the URL into the address bar. The video loads. It’s titled “Female Muscle MILF Gives Asian Boy Lots to be Thankful for.” How charming. Clearly the title is a reference to Thanksgiving.

Sean watches the whole thing. All 35 minutes of it. Wow. Just wow. He remembers every moment of it in fine detail. He recalls how he felt when he first saw her. When he first heard her husky voice. When he was taken inside the camera crew’s van. When he first walked into the mansion. When she dropped her fur coat and revealed her immaculate muscular body. When they first kissed. When he fisted her. When he entered her and fucked her. When she came and squirted all over the floor. The exhaustion. The thrill. The pleasure. Everything.

Wow. And all recorded on a nice HD camera. Quite impressive. Sean likes it. A lot.

He wonders how many people have seen the video so far. 6 views. Well, it’s a start.

Right?

Later that night, at 9:45 p.m. Sean checks the website again. Only 17 views. Pretty dismal. No comments. To be fair, who wants to sit down and watch a 35-minute video clip of a muscular woman fucking some anonymous random guy? Obviously, he doesn’t mind, but he can’t speak for the general population. Right before going to bed at 10:30 p.m., he checks it again. 29 views. Hm. 12 more than 45 minutes ago. At this rate, he and Bridgette will break Gangnam Style’s viewing record in the year 4015.

He goes to bed and drifts off to sleep. Ah, bliss.

The next morning, Sean wakes up and decides to make his own coffee. He usually buys an overpriced Starbucks soy latte on his way to the office, but in an effort to save a few bucks he made a promise to himself to brew his own java every once in a while. This morning would be one of those instances.

His coffee maker estimates it will be done in 3 and a half minutes. Well, that should give him enough time to check the Internet to see what’s going on out there in the world. Sean turns on his computer and opens a Google Chrome browser. CNN’s website is his homepage. When he looks at the top headline, his jaw drops to the floor.

“Viral porn video sets off firestorm”

Wait, what? He clicks on the story to read further. What follows would shock him more than he would ever be shocked in his life.

Earlier this morning a prominent Asian American senator from the state of Hawaii shared on his Twitter account a 35-minute pornographical film showcasing two individuals, one of them a young Asian American man, engaging in a videotaped sexual liaison with a muscular Caucasian woman.

The video was posted yesterday afternoon on the popular porn website Sexy Times Vidz and has skyrocketed to more than 2 million views in the past few hours. Senator Mark Yamada wrote on Twitter, “This video of an Asian American man starring in a mainstream porn is the type of empowering message we should be creating more often #AznPride.”

His tweet has been retweeted more than 50,000 times, including celebrities such as…

Sean continues to read in utter disbelief. He could not believe what he was reading. His video has gone viral. It’s popular now. Everyone around the country is talking about it. EVERYONE.

He doesn’t care if he’s late for work. He’s glued to his computer and doesn’t plan on going anywhere anytime soon. Soon, all the major networks are on the story. ABC News, NBC News, Fox News, The New York Times, USA Today, Time Magazine, Newsweek, etc. Everyone is talking about this video and giving their opinions regarding its social and political ramifications.

Social and political ramifications? What the fuck? It’s a cheaply made porno video! How is this even possible?!

Eventually, Sean does go to work. As he sits at his cubicle, he cannot help but follow this on-going story. By early afternoon, “Asian and FBB porn video” was trending worldwide on Twitter. Every Facebook status update was talking about it. When he went home, Sean turns on the TV and sees Bridgette (whose last name apparently is “Beaulieu”) being interviewed by various talking heads on every 24-hour news network. She refuses to reveal the name of the young Asian gentleman who appeared in the video with her no matter how many times she’s asked.

The next day, the firestorm continues. Opinion writers debate whether Sen. Yamada’s tweet was appropriate for an elected lawmaker. Others argue in favor of the video and feel like “marginalized Asian American men deserve videos like this to show the world they can be as sexually vibrant as their white counterparts.” Most of the publicity is positive. University academics, social critics, news reporters, college students and countless others had to make their “take” on this viral video known to the public.

Laurie Larson wearing a very sexy pink underwear.

Laurie Larson wearing a very sexy pink underwear.

Two days later the buzz continues. The video now has 4.5 million views. Bridgette Beaulieu has become an overnight sensation. She’s now an instant celebrity, and to a lesser extent, Sean also. Sean religiously checks the Internet to see what people are saying about it. One week later. Two weeks later. One whole month later. The conversation persists. The video now has 10 million views. Bridgette’s stock has risen to gargantuan proportions. Endorsement deals are flooding in for her. Bodybuilding contests everywhere on the planet want her to do guest posing and plug certain products. They don’t care about the fact that she’s also a porn actress. That stigma ended the moment her fame exploded like a nuclear bomb.

Maggie e-mails him again to let him know that he’s receiving endless piles of fan mail. Thousands of women around the world want to marry him. Even a few prominent female bodybuilders want to connect with him. But still, Maggie insists, they refuse to leak his identity. His blurred face will forever be how the general public recognizes him. It will never go beyond that.

Holy shit.

Four months later

Spring is right around the corner. The thrill of becoming an instant Internet celebrity has worn off. The buzz has finally died off. Sean realizes that weird chapter of his life is behind him now. Apparently, Bridgette is still profiting from her notoriety. Good for her.

Unfortunately, reading the thousands of comments on the video is enough to make him want to vomit. How malicious are people these days? Do they really have nothing better to do?

She looks gross!

God, so disgusting. Uhg

Why would you want to fuck someone who looks like a man?

I’ll bet he has a small penis LMAO

A white chick fucking an Azn dude? Fuck that shit. How much did he pay her lol

She’s faking it. She has to. His dick is too small to make her actually come. Asian guys are all small.

She’s a freak of nature! Groooooooooossssssssssssssssssssss

And on and on and on. After a while, Sean wisely chooses to ignore these vicious comments. Oh well. Let them make fun of me. It’s not like a gorgeous female bodybuilder has ever wanted to fuck them!

One chilly spring morning Sean leaves for work as usual. As an IT professional at a major consulting firm, Sean spends half of his time in the office and the other half working with clients on site visits. Today is a field day. A tax preparation company downtown needs his help getting their e-mail to work again. Apparently some idiot deleted all their accounts by accident. Whatever. Just another day at the office.

Jodi Miller looking as beautiful as ever.

Jodi Miller looking as beautiful as ever.

This whole week Sean’s car is being borrowed by his brother, whose faithful car became unfaithful and died without warning. Until he finds a replacement vehicle, Sean is left to rely on public transportation to get from Point A to Point B. This morning, he’s taking the train to get to downtown.

Tons of people are on the train today. Kids who are on spring break. Old people doing old people stuff. Men and women wearing suits who clearly work at jobs that pay better than his. An occasional homeless guy who smells like a skunk bathing in whale carcass.

45 minutes later (which included a really long wait at the first station stop) Sean exits the train and rides the long escalator to the upper street level. A horde of humanity bustling about their business greets him immediately. The first thing Sean does is try to identify a place to buy a cup of coffee and something decent to eat. Who has time for breakfast these days?

Wanting to skip the mundane routine that is Starbucks, Sean decides to try out a lesser known caffeine hole. He finds one. He stands in line and peers up at the menu. 12 ounce Mexican mocha? 8 ounce soy latte? Or what about good old fashioned drip coffee? And what about food? He looks through the glass counter and sees blueberry scones, bran muffins, lemon bars, fruit salads, and something that resembles oatmeal–

“Sean! Hi!”

Whoa, what?

“Sean! Is that you!? No way!”

He turns around to see where the voice is coming from. It’s a familiar voice. Gruff yet soothing. Rough yet gentle. Textured yet deeply feminine. Can it be…

It is!

Sitting at a red leather booth at the far corner of the café is exactly who he thinks it is. Someone he’s thought about constantly since that fateful night. Someone he’ll never forget as long as he lives.

Bridgette.

Beautiful, gorgeous Bridgette. Hanging out at a random café, sipping on a chilled Americano and eating a raspberry Danish. What the hell is she doing here? Isn’t she based in Los Angeles? Or was that whole charade completely made up?

“Bridgette! Oh my God, what on Earth are you doing here?” Sean asks. He surrenders his place in line and walks up to her. His appointment with his client isn’t for another half hour, so he has time to chat with this beautiful woman and get coffee later.

She stands up and moves around the table. They hug. Her tight embrace almost crushes him in half. They share a quick kiss. He can smell her musky scent. Normally he would be somewhat repulsed by this, but because it’s Bridgette…it might as well have been sweet perfume.

A cup of iced coffee.

A cup of iced coffee.

“I happen to be guest posing at the Western Regional Classic tomorrow night! Did you know that was happening in your city this weekend?” By now most everyone is glancing at Bridgette. It’s not often a stunningly gorgeous muscular woman is hanging around at your coffee shop. Wearing yoga pants (thank God!) and a tight sleeveless athletic shirt, every inch of her muscular physique is proudly displayed for the public to witness. Her veiny bulging arms are bared for all to see. Sean notices a few pedestrians stopping dead in their tracks and peering through the window to catch a glimpse of her massive guns.

“I’ve never heard of the Western Regional Classic. I take it this is some big bodybuilding contest?” Sean asks. They both sit down at the table. She takes another sip of her drink.

“Yes, your guess is right,” she says. “I’m not competing, but the federation director asked me to do some guest posing during the opening ceremonies. So here I am! Back in your neck of the woods. How are you doing since the last time we met?”

She winks and smirks. Both she and Sean know exactly how things have gone since their last face-to-face encounter. Their viral video skyrocketed them both to unparalleled notoriety. She’s since become one of the most sought after “adult entertainment” actresses. The production company has even said they’ve received countless inquiries asking for the “faceless Asian guy” to appear in more videos. Imagine that! Fame can be a funny thing sometimes, especially in today’s Digital Age.

“I’ve been great. I’m enjoying my, uh, sudden rise to anonymous stardom. How have you been? It seems like you’re one of the most popular women on the Internet these days.” He whispers this part of the conversation to avoid anyone hearing them. But given how many rude stares they’re getting, he doubts anyone is ignoring them.

“Yeah, no doubt about that. TV appearances, radio interviews, God, it’s out of control. But it’s totally worth it. I even made you a little star!”

Sean blushes. He subtly looks around to see if anyone is connecting the dots that he’s the one she randomly had sex with in that now infamous video. No one outwardly is reacting to their private conversation.

“Yes you did. And I enjoyed my 15 minutes of fame. Thank you again.”

“My pleasure. And your pleasure too. What are you off to right now?”

He realizes he’s wearing a suit, tie and a nice navy blue blazer. Not exactly casual wear for someone in the IT industry. Whenever he goes out on a client site visit, he wants to dress to impress. It’s the least he can do.

“I’m off to work. And you? Are you just killing time before the weekend starts?”

“Pretty much. You should swing by! All the tickets have been sold out, but I can totally get you through the doors. Are you busy at all?”

Sean doesn’t hesitate to answer her.

“Nope! Not busy at all. I would love to see you in action. I’d probably sneak past security if it came down to that.”

She smiles and takes another sip of her Americano. Sean feels a tingling sensation in his groin. He can’t stop looking at her killer physique. Ever since their fateful encounter, not a day goes by when he hasn’t thought about her.

“No need to sneak past anybody. If you want in, you’re in. Are you in?”

Hell yes. Fuck yes.

“Yes. I’d love to watch you perform. I’m in!”

Bridgette takes out her phone from her purse. They exchange numbers. He saves her under “Beautiful Bridgette” and puts his phone back in his pocket. She tells him to send her a text at 6:00 p.m. tomorrow evening right in front of her hotel (which is four blocks east of the convention center). She kisses him on the cheek and he finally gets back in line to order his coffee and breakfast. Everyone in the café is looking at him. Sean knows exactly what kinds of thoughts are going through their little minds.

How does he know her? Who is she? Look at the size of her arms! They’re fucking huge!

And so on. And so on. And so on. He doubts any of them have seen their infamous video, but then again anything is possible. She did appear on CNN. And every other network. That sort of media exposure has a way of getting your face known to all sorts of strangers across the country. But regardless, he knows for a fact none of them suspects he was the lucky fellow who had the privilege of making love to her that night. For that, he could only smile.

As he waved goodbye to Bridgette and walked northwest toward his client’s office, Sean felt a level of giddiness that he hasn’t felt in a long while. Probably not since he was a little kid impatiently anticipating Christmas morning.

He can’t wait to see her pose on that stage in front of thousands of screaming fans. He can’t wait to be one of them. He also can’t wait for whatever happens next. He has no idea what’s in store after the evening’s festivities come to an end, but he does know one thing:

He can’t wait to be with her.

Bridgette – The Unlikely Porn Star (part two)

Mindi O'Brien, ladies and gentlemen.

Mindi O’Brien, ladies and gentlemen.

Sean takes a deep breath and exhales. Oh boy. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees a red light flash next to the camera lens. We’re rolling. And this is when things get real. Very real.

Bridgette starts off the action by slowly approaching Sean and putting her arms around his waist. She squeezes him tightly, causing an electric jolt to run down his back. Wow, is she really that strong? What kind of a physique does she have hiding underneath that fur coat?

“Come here, pretty boy. Thank you for coming over to my place,” Bridgette says, the sensuality dripping from her husky voice. “Is there anything I can do to make your Thanksgiving more memorable?”

Sean struggles to come up with something to say. “Roleplaying” was never his strength. He never knew the right thing to say. Besides, how clever could you possibly be given these unusual circumstances?

“I can think of many things, but what I’m really looking forward to is the big Thanksgiving feast,” he finally says. Damn! Is that the best he can do?

“Well, I’ll give you something to feast on!” Bridgette whispers in his ear.

She releases him, takes a few steps back, and reveals her Body. Bridgette unbuttons her fur coat, twirls around theatrically, and drops it to the floor. What Sean sees standing before him makes his whole body freeze.

WOW!!!

Bridgette isn’t just a big lady. She’s a big muscular lady!

Revealing her full figure, Sean’s jaw drops to the floor as he gazes upon Bridgette’s divine body. Finely chiseled, perfectly proportioned, enormously massive, and still unmistakably feminine, her body is a magnificent sight to behold. Big muscles everywhere, by Sean’s estimation Bridgette must be some kind of professional bodybuilder. She must have tons of trophies sitting around somewhere with an incredible physique like hers!

Holy FUCKING shit!!!!!!!!

She also is completely nude, which Sean just realizes. Whoa. She was naked the entire time underneath that fur coat!

“Surprised by what you see?” Bridgette smirks. Sean’s eyes are wider than flying saucers.

“Yes, I am! Holy smokes! You look…incredible!” Deep down inside, Sean has always admired strong women. As a kid, he used to buy old fitness magazines for 50 cents at a local library and sneak into his room and ogle at the pictures of fitness girls. Ever since then he’s secretly had a “thing” for beautiful girls with muscle. Little did he ever imagine he’d actually meet one in real life!

“I don’t just look incredible. I feel incredible. Here, come see for yourself.” She walks toward him, stark naked, and holds up her right bicep for him to feel. Sean touches it, bestowing upon it his utmost attention. Dear God, it’s sooooooooo hard! Sean has never felt biceps so hard before. Looking at Bridgette from head to toe, he’s never ever seen up-close-and-personal a woman with so much muscle. It’s like she’s from another planet…

“Impressed? You certainly looked impressed,” she observes.

“Yes, ma’am. I’m very much impressed. You probably work really hard to look like this. God, I can’t possibly imagine what you have to do to look as beautiful as this,” Sean says. Now completely oblivious to the camera, Sean has been transported to a whole other dimension. Only she and he exist; no one else.

This camera would be difficult to mount over your shoulder.

This camera would be difficult to mount over your shoulder.

“Let’s see what you got, pretty boy.” Bridgette leans forward and unbuckles Sean’s belt. He feels an erection forming. Should he be embarrassed by this?

Sean takes in another deep breath but forgets to exhale once Bridgette successfully pulls his pants down to his ankles. He lifts his feet as she rips his pants off and tosses them across the room. He finally exhales when she begins to take off his shoes.

“You look so good, little boy. From the moment I first saw you, I knew I wanted you to come to bed with me. If you had said ‘no,’ I don’t know what I would have done with myself,” Bridgette confesses. By now Sean is only wearing his underwear and shirt. Bridgette turns around and bends over. Her rounded butt pushes against his now erect penis. Sean’s heart races like a wild horse.

“Spank me. Go ahead. I’ve been a naughty little muscle girl!” Instead of spanking her, Sean cups her firm cheeks in his hands and savors the feeling. So hard. So full. But so beautiful at the same time. Finally, he lightly slaps her on her right butt cheek. Sean watches it jiggle up and down.

“Oh! Yes, yes, yes! That’s what I’m talking about. I like that.”

“What else do you like?” By now Sean has gotten more comfortable “acting” in front of the camera. He’s completely forgotten that a camera crew is watching them. Jimmy, Tony, Lexie and Maggie might as well not exist. They don’t matter anymore.

Bridgette turns back toward him and kisses him on the lips. This sudden act of intimacy steals his breath away. He feels her small breasts and plays with her erect nipples. Oh my God! They must be at least an inch and a half long! He pinches them greedily.

“Ouch! That hurts!”

Surprised, Sean crashes back to reality. He releases her nipples and backs off.

“Oh my God! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Sean apologizes. He could tell she wasn’t really hurt when she throws her head back and laughs.

“Do you really think you could give me pain? I’m a strong muscle girl. No one, especially you, could hurt me. I’m stronger and more muscular than most guys, aren’t I?” She raises her left leg toward him, challenging him to feel it. He touches her thick thigh, a shiver going down his spine as he feels her beautiful leg. Sean, without a doubt, is a Leg Guy.

“So…strong…” Sean says, in a daze. Bridgette puts her leg down and takes off her fur boots. Now completely naked, she strikes a few bodybuilding poses and smiles incessantly. Sean watches in amazement and applauds after she finishes.

“Thank you. You might not be able to give me pain, but you certainly should be able to give me…pleasure.”

Pleasure? He sure hopes so! Sean has never had sex with a white woman before. Only small and petite Asian girls. He’s certain he’s been able to satisfy all of them. But could he match up with a big muscular woman like Bridgette?

“I’d like to think so,” he says. Bridgette goes to him and rips off his shirt. Literally. She grabs his shirt by the collar and tears it apart. Sean nearly climaxes just from her amazing show of strength. Luckily, this is an old shirt that Sean only wears when he doesn’t plan on being seen in public for too long. Going to the store is one thing. Starring in a porno is quite another. So he doesn’t mind not being able to wear this shirt ever again.

This is what I imagine the condo would be like.

This is what I imagine the condo would be like.

Only his underwear remains. His erection, which Sean suddenly becomes very self-conscious about, strains against the blue fabric. Aren’t male porn stars supposed to be well-endowed? Sean doesn’t think he’s small down there, but he isn’t completely confident in it either. His last girlfriend, a 4’11” Vietnamese girl, seemed to enjoy their lovemaking sessions. His girlfriend before that, a 5’1” Japanese girl, also never complained about their bedroom activities. The girl he lost his virginity to at the age of 15 was half Chinese and half Korean. She was on the high school gymnastics team. She was smaller and skinner than the other two girls (if that were even possible!). But Bridgette is something else entirely. She’s probably had many lovers in her life. Her expectations must be through the roof. How would Sean measure up to them?

“Enough of the foreplay. I’ve been ready since the moment I first met you. How should we do this?” Bridgette stretches her arms and legs as if she were preparing for a track meet. Sean expects his erection to burst out of his underwear if it doesn’t come off soon. As if she has extrasensory perception, Bridgette goes to him and pulls his underwear to the floor. She bends down to inspect his penis. Sean starts to sweat. His heart pounds so loudly he wouldn’t be surprised if everyone in the room could hear it.

She kisses the sensitive tip. Goosebumps rise from every pore of his skin. Bridgette then licks the side, tasting it as if it were an ice cream cone. Sean is afraid if she continues to do this, he could come within seconds. He closes his eyes and tries to think of something else to prolong the moment. Nothing productive comes to mind.

“So beautiful. So hard. You’re definitely ready for me, little boy,” Bridgette tells him between licks. She tickles his scrotum with her hard, calloused fingers. All her years of weightlifting has deadened almost all the skin on her hands. The sensation of her rigid touch against his erection forces a sudden gasp to escape from his lips.

“I have an idea. Follow me,” Bridgette orders. She stands up, takes his hand and drags him to the far north corner of the bedroom. Jimmy removes the camera from the tripod and follows them with the camera slung over his shoulder. Tony sneaks closely behind holding the boom microphone. Lexie turns a light toward their direction. Maggie remains where she is, standing and watching intently.

Bridgette takes them to the 180 degree curved window overlooking the sea. She tugs on a rope which pulls back the curtains. Sean looks out, admiring the gorgeous night skyline view. But it’s his view of her that impresses him more. She’s so fucking beautiful! How the hell did he get so lucky for all of this to happen to him? His mom asking him to bake a pecan pie for Thanksgiving dinner was probably the best coincidence to ever happen to him.

“Everyone in the city can see us, can’t they?” Bridgette has finished pulling the curtain back. Sean realizes she’s absolutely right. On top of a hill overlooking the busy downtown, there’s no doubt anyone who happened to look up at this condo building at this moment would have a perfect view of this porno being shot. Oh God, what if someone he knew were seeing this now?

“You’re such a voyeuristic lady, aren’t you?” She’s surprised Sean is able to adequately carry on a coherent conversation.

“I am. So let’s give them a show!” Bridgette turns around, puts her hands against a railing in front of the window, bends over forward and spreads her legs wide open. Sean could see her soaking wet vagina and enlarged clitoris dripping with moisture all the way to the carpet. Her readiness arouses him further.

It’s time to act. Fuck it. Fuck all of it. Fuck all his failed relationships. Fuck his dead end job. Fuck every single time he’s been rejected for anything in his life. It’s time to fuck all if it and fuck this gorgeous female bodybuilder in front of a worldwide audience. It’s time to show the world that I’m a Man and I deserve to be here with her. It’s time to act–

“Shit! Stop stalling! I’m fucking dripping over here! Did you hear me? Go on and fuck me, Goddammit!”

Sean immediately returns back to his senses. His eyes sharpen. His focus is singular.

“Yes, ma’am!”

Sean goes to her and grips her hips with both hands. Jimmy is filming them from the right side. Sean could almost hear the camera buzzing. It’s now or never. He takes a deep breath and exhales slowly. He pokes her sensitive passageway with his index finger and explores her wetness. Bridgette moans. Feeling bold, he puts a second finger inside her and prods further. Her breathing intensifies. Jimmy gets down on one knee so he can get a better angle of her vagina. Sean, desiring to show the world he can be the Greatest Lover in the Universe, delicately pushes a third finger inside her. His fingers move quicker. He knows he’s found her G-spot when a loud groan escapes from her throat. He’s on fire. He’s feeling empowered. He knows this is his time to shine.

Flavia Crisos. I can't even comprehend her.

Flavia Crisos. I can’t even comprehend her.

“Oh, fuck! God, you are so fucking amazing! More, more, more…” Bridgette moans. Her throaty cries embolden him even more. Sean squats down so he can see better. A fourth finger enters her. Then his thumb. He drives his entire fist inside her outstretched vagina and thrusts it in and out at a deliberate pace. Bridgette’s moans turn to screams. Is she acting? Or is she being real in this moment?

After one final push, Bridgette comes and squirts a small amount of fluid onto his fist. He quickly removes his hand from her vagina and watches a pool of her feminine juices form on the lily white carpet. Out of breath, Bridgette leans against the railing but keeps her legs wide apart. Now, it’s his turn. Sean stands up and grabs his penis. He rubs the head of his manhood against her very wet opening and gradually pushes it until it’s completely in. He moans. She moans back. Jimmy scoots back so he can capture every inch of the action.

“Fuck me.” Bridgette can’t wait any longer. Neither can he.

“My pleasure.”

Methodically at first, but gradually getting faster and faster, Sean thrusts in and out of her in front of the entire city. He pinches her butt cheeks and feels the muscles in her broad back. Bridgette’s grip on the metal railing has not loosened. She might break it in half if she’s not careful!

His pace quickens. His thrusts intensify. Her breathing becomes heavy. Out of nowhere, Sean realizes he’s not wearing protection. Bridgette doesn’t seem concerned by this vulnerability. So he doesn’t worry either.

When the lights are shining the brightest, how would you perform?

When the lights are shining the brightest, how would you perform?

Bridgette brings her legs closer together and squeezes her vagina, tightening herself around him. Sean gasps. He claws his fingers against her back then decides to reach lower and stroke her clit. Fuck! It’s enormous! Her clit is almost the size of a small penis! Sean never imagined he’d ever see a woman so well-endowed in his entire life. He pinches her clit, which makes Bridgette jolt upward. She tosses her head back and growls. He’s surprised she didn’t fly through the roof. Sean’s close to coming, but he knows how to control himself. He wants to make love to her for as long as he possibly could.

As her second orgasm builds toward its finish, she rocks her bottom back and forth to complement his thrusts. Sweat drips off her beautiful face. Jimmy is as still as a statue, capturing every moment of their coupling. Even Maggie seems intrigued by what’s happening. She wonders whether Bridgette is “acting” or if she’s actually enjoying herself. As a 30+ year veteran of the porn industry, she’s seen her share of fake orgasms. But Bridgette’s orgasms look and sound very fucking real!

“Oh, God…” Sean mutters under his breath.

Sean can’t hold it any longer. His pace quickens to a maximum level. Bridgette appears as though she’s going to pass out. Finally, after trying to hold back as much as he can, Sean climaxes and empties himself into her. Bridgette tightens and releases her vaginal muscles once more, prompting her to climax after him. Sean releases into her for what seems like an eternity.

“Mmmmmmm,” Bridgette grumbles. Her grip on the railing loosens.

As Sean’s spasms subside, he continues to caress her muscular back with finesse. Completely spent, Bridgette collapses to the floor and curls up in a ball. Sean falls down with her and massages her six-pack abs. He kisses her neck. She lovingly strokes his softened penis with one hand and fondles her swollen clit with the other. Jimmy is now standing over them, the camera pointed downward. Tony smirks. Lexie smiles. Maggie remains stoned face.

Cut. That’s a wrap.

Bridgette – A Stranger in the Night (part one)

When you think of Bridgette, think about Kris Murrell.

When you think of Bridgette, think about Kris Murrell.

“Excuse me, can I ask you something?”

Sean turns around to see where that voice came from. When he does, his jaw nearly drops.

“Um, pardon me? Are you talking to me?” Sean asks.

On this chilly late November evening, Sean had no intention of being bothered by anyone. Thanksgiving is in two days and he still hasn’t bought the ingredients necessary to make the pecan pie his mother told him to make. Sean’s a big boy, but mommy’s guilt-inducing passive aggressive behavior still cuts deep into his soul.

Sean’s business on this evening was simple. Go to the store and buy what he needs to make this pie. Little did he expect to be accosted by a complete stranger during the short 10-minute walk to his neighborhood market. And especially by this kind of a stranger.

“Yes, I’m talking to you, silly! Who else would I be speaking to?” She looks around and points out that there is absolutely no one else on the sidewalk at this time of night.

This woman, who looks to be anywhere between 30 and 35, is wearing a long wolf grey fur coat that covers her entire figure. With a bright red wool beanie on her head, a lock of blonde hair rests along her left cheek. Her pretty face looks harder around the edges than most women Sean has ever seen. She has a raspy voice that’s husky but unquestionably feminine at the same time.

“You’re right. You wouldn’t be talking to anyone. So, what’s your question?” Sean says.

The woman approaches Sean. He subtly backs away – not out of fear, but out of instinct. He can’t quite put his finger on it, but there was something very intimidating about her. She’s nearly his height and doesn’t appear to be hostile, but she gave off an aura of…intimidation.

“It’s a very unorthodox question, but I must preface it with this: You know what’s happening this Thursday, right?”

Sean blinks.

“Uh, yes. This Thursday is Thanksgiving. Is that what you’re referring to?”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m referring to. Thanksgiving is, of course, a day for giving thanks, wouldn’t you agree?” A creepy smile flashes across her beautiful face. Can he trust her?

“Thanksgiving is indeed a day of giving thanks, yes,” Sean replies.

“Good. Recently, I decided I wanted to experiment with something. I want to do a favor for you. I want to give you a reason to say “thanks” when this day is over. I want to do something nice for you, even though we’ve never met and you have no reason to trust me,” she says.

A lonely street on a quiet evening.

A lonely street on a quiet evening.

No reason to trust her? She’s got that right! Who the hell is she–

“What’s your name?” she asks.

“Sean. Sean Kimura. What’s your name, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“I don’t mind at all. My name is Bridgette. Pleased to meet you.” She extends her hand and Sean shakes it. Her firm grip surprises him. Wow! She’s strong! Sean has never met a woman with such a powerful handshake.

“Likewise, Bridgette. It’s chilly out here, so I don’t want to be standing outside for long. What’s the favor you want to do for me?”

“The favor I want to do for you can be summarized in the question I’d like to ask you.”

Amused by her stalling tactics, Sean grins back. While it is chilly outside, it’s not as unbearably cold as he suggested. He just wants to see where this unusual conversation is going.

“Ask me the question. If you take any longer, this day may end without me saying “thanks” to you,” Sean jokes. Bridgette chuckles.

“Alright. Will you have sex with me?”

Sean nearly falls over on the sidewalk. Luckily for him, he successfully keeps his balance.

“Uh, excuse me? Did I hear you correctly?”

“Yes, you heard that as clearly as you could possibly hear it. It’s a simple question. Will you have sex with me?”

Sean is silent. Bridgette senses his astonishment and decides to take the lead in this exchange.

“Look, I understand this probably sounds like a joke. But it’s not a joke. I want to have sex with someone tonight. A complete stranger. No strings attached. We don’t have to exchange phone numbers. In fact, we didn’t even have to exchange names. Just a simple roll in the hay. Nothing more, nothing less. It’s as simple as it sounds.” A sudden gust of wind roars by and sweeps the lock of hair across her nose. Watching Bridgette twitch her nose somewhat turns him on.

“Who are you? A philanthropic prostitute?”

Bridgette laughs. Then she suddenly stops and grabs Sean by the shoulders. Demonstrating her strength, Sean is pulled against her and he is helpless to escape her grasp.

That pecan pie sure looks delicious!

That pecan pie sure looks delicious!

“Nice use of alliteration. But I’m not a whore. If you call me a whore again, I swear I’ll kick the living shit out of you, understand?” Sean nods in agreement. Sensing his fear, Bridgette releases him and he almost falls backward.

“I’m…uh, sorry…”

“Don’t apologize, kid. Just listen to me. Here’s the catch. Do you see that dark blue van parked across the street there?” She points to a dark blue van that is indeed parked across the street. Sean nods.

“Good. Inside that van is a small camera crew. Just three people. A camera operator, a sound guy and a lighting girl. The four of us aren’t from around here. We just flew in from L.A. earlier this morning. You want to know what industry we belong to?”

Sean’s head is spinning at a million miles per hour. Did he just walk into an “Inception” style dream?

“No, I have no clue what industry you belong to. What?”

“We work in the porn industry. I’m new to the field, but for the time being, I’m a pornographic actress. Before that I was a professional athlete. But you can only compete in that dog-eat-dog world for so long before you want to blow your brains out. So now I’m doing this.”

Check that. This isn’t “Inception.” This is more like “The Twilight Zone!”

“The concept of our next film project is simple. I go up to a random stranger in the middle of a quiet suburban neighborhood and ask him to have sex with me. You say “yes” and we then return back to our condo where we have sex on camera. Do you see this?” Bridgette points to a lapel microphone attached to her coat. The black mic blended in with her grey fur coat, so Sean didn’t notice it until now.

“This entire conversation has been recorded. In fact, our every movement has been recorded, isn’t that right, Jimmy?” She points to a hedge across the street near the van. A hand pokes out and waves to them. Sean is completely speechless. What the fuck is this all about?

“Jimmy is our cameraman. He’s been in the business for years. To make a long story short, all you have to do is sign a waiver and come with us to the condo we’re renting for the week. We do the deed and we’ll post the video on our website just in time for Thanksgiving dinner. And don’t worry. We’ll blur out your face and even mute your voice so no one will recognize that it’s you. You wouldn’t want your friends and family to know that you’ve starred in a porno, right?”

“No, that wouldn’t be something I’d like them to know about.” Whoa.

“So…what do you say? Are you in?”

Sean looks at the van and the bushes where Jimmy is staked out behind his camera. He looks back at Bridgette and sizes her up. Her big frame suggests she’s either really fat (with a remarkably skinny face) or her fur coat is tremendous in thickness. She’s probably great in bed if she’s a professional porn star. Hm. Why the hell not?

“Yes. Why the hell not? Count me in!” Sean has never been one to take risks, but after being unexpectedly dumped by his long-time girlfriend earlier this year (on Valentine’s Day, if you can believe that!), Sean is definitely in the mood to “rebel” and be a bad boy for once in his life. Enough Mr. Nice Guy. It’s time to be a bad motherfucker.

“Great! Come with us.” Bridgette turns around and leads Sean toward the van. Jimmy gets up out of his crouched position and follows them to the van carrying a large camera over his shoulder. These people are in the porn industry! Holy fuck!

Bridgette opens the van’s side door and ushers Sean inside. The driver, an overweight middle-aged balding man wearing a tacky Hawaiian shirt, shakes his hand as he sits down.

“Hello. I’m Tony. I’m the sound guy.”

“Pleased to meet you, Tony. My name is Sean.” Jimmy the cameraman opens the back door and enters. Bridgette closes the door once she settles in.

“And my name is Lexie. I’m the lighting and makeup girl.” Sean looks at Lexie and sees a short and petite black girl who looks like she could still be in high school. He shakes her hand.

“Great. Now that you know everyone, let’s roll,” Bridgette orders. Tony immediately starts up the engine and drives off into the cold dark night. Sean’s fear subsides for now. These people seem very friendly…at least thus far. Once the camera starts to roll for real, who knows what this evening is going to be like?

A beautiful grey fur coat.

A beautiful grey fur coat.

The drive to the condo doesn’t take long. It’s in a swanky part of town that Sean rarely visits. Overseeing the ocean, the condo complex is on top of a hill and looks to be well out of his price range. Sean would go completely broke just living here for a single week!

Bridgette tells him the condo is owned by an ultra-wealthy porn enthusiast who’s out of town for the week. They got this place for free (which is why they chose to film this porno out here instead of down in L.A.) and had unlimited freedom to decorate it ask they’d like. Tony parks the van in the vast parking lot and the five of them get out. Sean marvels at the palatial building that definitely is out of his price range.

They step inside and see a middle-aged woman smoking a cigarette.

“This is Maggie, our producer. She has the form you need to sign,” Bridgette explains as she takes off her shoes. Tony, Jimmy and Lexie disappear inside the condo. Sean is in a daze and still cannot believe what’s happening to him. Maggie shoves a piece of paper in his face.

“Read over it and sign it. Then go upstairs for further instructions,” Maggie coldly instructs.

“Okay, yes ma’am,” Sean replies.

Maggie smirks and continues to smoke her cigarette. Sean tries to hold back a cough. He briefly skims it and silently nods in agreement.

“Everything look good? Great. Sign it.” Maggie hands him a fountain pen and he scribbles his signature on the dotted line. Maggie takes the waiver and disappears into an adjacent room. Bridgette grabs Sean’s hand and escorts him upstairs.

The walk up the long twisted staircase leaves Sean out of breath. Bridgette, on the other hand, hardly breaks a sweat. She takes him to a dressing room on the second (or is it the third or fourth?) floor. The room is filled with mirrors, light bulbs, makeup equipment, hangers, costumes, cans of hairspray and enough foundation to last a Victoria’s Secret photographer for a lifetime. She sits down on a stool and begins to reapply her eyeliner. Sean just stands there, amazed that he’s actually doing this. One moment he’s going out to buy stuff for pecan pie, the next he’s on the verge of becoming an impromptu porn star.

“Are you getting nervous?” Bridgette asks. Methodically putting on her eyeliner, Sean notices she hasn’t taken off her enormous fur coat yet. The room is unbearably hot with all the light bulbs flashing at maximum brightness. What’s her deal?

“No, I’m not nervous. Things are happening way too fast for me to become nervous. I’m more…excited,” Sean begins. “That might not be the right word. This is very surreal.”

She turns to him and smiles. Bridgette crosses her legs and bounces her dark brown furry boot up and down. Sean takes note of how large her calves are. Holy hell! Is that fat or…muscle?

“Of course this is surreal. I don’t blame you for being a little disjointed. If I were you, I’d probably freak out and run as far away from here as possible. Are you ready?” She stands up and looks at Sean eye-to-eye. He blinks twice. She chuckles.

“Uh, sure. I’m ready. Better now than never, right?”

Bridgette slaps him hard on the shoulder. The blunt force of her playful jab almost makes him tumble backward.

“Damn right! Let’s get started. My crew is usually really fast at setting up. They’re all pros. You look great. You’re a handsome boy, Sean,” she says. Sean blushes. It’s not too often that a non-Asian woman calls him “handsome.” That sort of compliment is usually reserved for the Asian girls he dates. But even among them, those kinds of comments are far and few between.

Bridgette grabs his hand and once again leads him to another room. They leave the dressing room, walk down a ridiculously long hallway, make a sharp left turn and enter a new room. The bedroom. Holy shit! This bedroom is bigger than Sean’s entire apartment! The rich sure do know how to live…

Brenda Smith has a gorgeous set of calves.

Brenda Smith has a gorgeous set of calves.

A queen sized bed sits at the end of an arched 180 degree window overlooking the seaside. Fancy curtains, tapestries, artworks and custom-made furniture adorn the room.

Sean’s eyes open wide at the sheer audacity of the bedroom. He sees Tony, Jimmy and Lexie hard at work setting up the scene. Maggie comes in and speaks to Bridgette about something. He couldn’t quite hear what they were saying. After a few moments, Jimmy announces they’re ready to begin shooting.

“Sound is ready to go,” Tony announces.

“Ditto with the lights. I’m good,” Lexie responds.

“Great! Let’s get this thing started. The great thing about reality-based pornography is that no rehearsal is necessary. Just go with the flow and follow my lead, got it?” Bridgette asks Sean. Sean can only smile and nod. Is there any other appropriate response?

Tony puts on his headset. Maggie and Lexie stand back and watch. Jimmy is behind his camera, which is now mounted on top of a tripod, and gives the “thumbs up” sign. Bridgette’s team is ready to rock and roll.

Lights. Camera. Action.